I regret causing your doubt
by Kagami Luna
Summary: Portgaz. D Ace didn't regret dying. He didn't regret saving his brother. He regretted not being able to prevent his little brothers screams, his wounds, and his tears. "It's all my fault. I'm sorry Luffy, it's all my fault." - Complete


This is going to remain a one-shot. I tried to do more with it, but no matter what i did nothing good came from my efforts. I had ideas, but they didn't end up working. Sorry to anyone who was waiting for me to continue this.

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Monkey D. Luffy isn't some sort of momma's boy or a daddy's boy. He's not particularly close to his grandfather and he doesn't know a grandmother. He doesn't have an aunt or an uncle or a cousin, but Luffy **did **have two older brothers.

When his oldest brother, Sabo died he felt like a part of him had died as well. Luffy could only stand again because of Ace. Ace was like his lifeline, his role model, his family. He managed to stand again, to get up, to keep walking, because of Ace's promise. Ace promised he would never die. That was the **ONE **promise Ace broke.

When he heard of his brother's execution Luffy freaked, for lack of better word. He infiltrated Impel down, where Ace was being kept and wreaked havoc on the place. It didn't matter that it was the strongest prison in the world. Or that no one had ever escaped, let alone broke in. Luffy stormed through the whole prison, sustained injury's anyone else would have died from almost instantly, and escaped with hundreds of prisoners.

So when his brother had to **PrTeCt **HiM, instead of the other way around for once Luffy started to slip. The happiness he had felt when Ace had been freed vanished. When Ace died to **prOtEcT**_**h**_I**m, **he completely slipped. He broke. Luffy broke out the feeling of sheer loneliness. His nakama where separated all over the grandline, his bid brothers dead. It wasn't like when Ace had set out to become a pirate. Luffy hadn't really felt like his Onii- san had left him then. When he saw him again as a pirate himself everything seemed fine. Better than fine, he was on the strongest man in the world's crew, it was awesome!

Luffy felt proud that he could be Ace's little brother. Ace was awesome and even stronger! He even had a Devil's Fruit now! Luffy had so much he wanted to do with Ace. He had wanted to challenge Ace again; perhaps he would have been able to win now!

But it was all too much for Luffy. He was in a horrible war, just for his big brother. _**His big brother who was now dead.**_

"ACE!" the scream was barely a word. It was hysterical. Ace, Ace, ACE! But Ace was gone…

The scream broke his nakama's hearts from thousands of miles away. He wanted to see his _nakama._ He wanted his crew. And they wanted to be with him. _**they wanted to help him and be by his side like he was always by theirs.**_

Luffy rampaged though the maiden island of amazon lily screaming and insane. He screamed loud and hard enough or his thought to be bleeding, but he didn't stop.

He came to a point where the trees broke and screamed though a sob. The screams turned to obsessive screaming sobs. Luffy fell to his knees and pounded the ground in despair. He sat up and screamed to the heavens.

"PIRATE KING? YEAH RIGHT!" Luffy sobbed and chocked "_**I'M TO…**__**WEAK! **_This is the man who never felt doubt. He never doubted his strength. He never doubted his nakama. And he never doubted his strength to protect his nakama. The scream of doubt, that single moment of self doubt.

_IT BROKE HIS BROTHER'S HEART._

Ace watched his brother through a mirror shard. Tears threated to spill down his face as he watched Luffy break down. The tears flooded over his face a second later. _Damn it Luffy…_

Portgaz. D Ace didn't regret dying. He didn't regret saving his brother. He regretted not being able to prevent his little brothers screams, his wounds, and his tears. "It's all my fault. I'm sorry Luffy, it's all my fault." He whispered in a voice that was so sad and out of character you'd almost think you had the wrong man.

A woman with a magenta colored Mohawk and ponytail crunched a cigarette butt between her fingers and set her mouth in a grim line. She shaded her eyes and waited.

"Baka otouto." She heard him mutter in a voice that lacked the slightest hint of strength. So it was his brother. She winced in memory of watching those _she _had left behind go through a big mess spurred by her death. If memory served her the man in front of her was the older brother of the boy who saved the one who it hit hardest.

_Nami..._

_Damn it!_ She walked over to the dead man in a mix of fury and excitement. Though her thoughts quickly vanished that excitement. _He left behind that poor Mugiwara boy... The boy who saved Nami. _She tapped him on the shoulder. At first she had just wanted to see his face, but the look he gave her… She pulled back her fist and clocked him on the jaw. That pathetic look, she hated it. It reminded her too much of back then.

"Oi! What the hell obaa-san!" His face changed for just a second, and a hit of his true character shown through, almost. But that god damn fucking look snapped right back onto his face.

_It's just as hard for those who are left behind as it is for those who watch them._

She, no, Bellemere unleashed her fury.

"I've had it!" Ace's face barely changed. He simply stared her in the eyes blankly. "IVE HAD IT WITH THAT PATHETIC LOOK!" Bellemere looked like the devil himself. Ace looked away. "Stop pitying yourself for dying and not helping mugiwara boy! He's just as bad as you! But if I know that girl she won't let her captain down! He'll be fine! Get over yourself and MOVE ON!" Bellemere let a completely crushed cigarette butt fall lifelessly to the ground from where it had sat crushed between her fingers. She looked like she was going to start yelling once more but Ace to her shock cut her off.

"Urusai! I'm not pitying myself! I don't regret dying!" the tears that had stopped just moments ago came again. And Bellemere's eyes widened. _I don't regret dying._

"I REGRET NOT BEING ABLE TO FULLY PROTECT MY OTOUTO! I REGRET LEAVING HIM AND MAKING HM GO THOUGH THAT! I REGRET-" Ace gulped down tears. "I regret making him call himself weak. I regret causing his doubt."

Bellemere looked at Ace in shock before giving a slight smile. _He's just like Roger. _Kneeling down in front of him Bellemere enveloped him in a hug.

"You're otouto is strong. He'll stand up again. He'll be able to walk forward. Besides he's not alone, eh?" Bellemere gave one Hiken no Ace a watery smile. "He's got his nakama!" Ace looked up at the woman, a complete stranger really, and couldn't help but give a grin of his own.

"I guess you're right." he said a bit hesitantly. She gave him a cheeky grin and helped him up. And wish a feral grin,

"So how's my adorable little daughter doing? Last I saw she was on your baka otouto's crew."

_Jeez Luffy, even in death I don't seem to catch a break, do I? _Ace let out a little chuckle and walked forward. Pocketing his little shard of mirror. He wouldn't need it for a long time now. The son of the first pirate king stepped forward with the former marine and into _**DEATH.**_

_**Ace we will never forget you, it's cheesy but you'll never really be dead. Until the day you're forgotten you will live on forever.**_

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…..At least in fan fiction. What did you think?


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